Mainstream media’s in a furor over der Führer again, and just in time for Christmas! Dr. Peter Fleischmann’s verified a long-standing urban legend based on the formerly missing prison records from Adolf Hitler’s stint at Landsberg prison. It all began with the British military song, “Hitler has only got one ball”.
Hitler has only got one ball,
Göring has two but very small,
Himmler has something sim’lar,
But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.
Questioning an enemy’s masculinity is good for morale, but most historians don’t take the jokes seriously. Over the years there have been many claims to a nugget of truth supporting the story. Back in the sixties, a former German army medic confided how Hitler was injured in the groin during World War I, at the price of his testicle.
According to the rediscovered documents, Hitler was examined by Dr. Brin Steiner upon arriving at Landsberg prison. Steiner noted the newest inmate was healthy but his right testicle was “probably stunted” from cryptorchidism.1 This flies in the face of the alleged Soviet autopsy report stating, “The left testicle could not be found either in the scrotum or on the spermatic cord inside the inguinal canal, or in the small pelvis”.2 Maybe they recovered the Mirror Universe’s Hitler, hence the confusion?