Eat Your Hearts Out, Patterson and Gimlin! Beware MEGAFOOT!

Eat Your Hearts Out, Patterson and Gimlin! Beware MEGAFOOT!

megafootBlurry, lame, YouTube squatching videos pale in comparison to DARPA’s latest initiative to develop the ultimate super soldier. Part machine, part bigfoot, and 100% carnage, Megafoot is poised to make cinematic history on a shoestring budget.

Our world needs are more B-movies, and the team behind this production cut their teeth writing and producing films with a single purpose, being awesome. Justin Martell, producer of Troma’s Return to Nuke ‘Em High, and screenwriter Rolfe Kanefsky, the genius behind Nightmare Man and There’s Nothing Out There, will breathe life into their rampaging robotic cryptid.

The team’s Indiegogo campaign has momentum, drumming up $6,000 of their $35,000 goal with twentysomething days left, bringing the world closer making their dream a reality. For good reason too. Lamestream media screws up good, established material, like NBC adapting Constantine for the small screen, turning John into a non-smoker.1 Imagining how big studios would screw up this opus is incalculably cringeworthy.

You’re the focus group, ensuring Megafoot is original, keeping cinema relevant and fun in a world where crap like This Is The End gets pinched out of Hollywood’s poop chute.

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Just don’t take my word for it.


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  1. http://www.thewrap.com/constantine-matt-ryan-nbc-dc-comics 

3 Comments

  1. Coppertop

    03/17/2014 at 5:44 AM

    Oh my god. I never knew I needed a cyborg Bigfoot movie until this very moment. All the universes have aligned to bring us this treasure.

    Seriously, if this doesn’t get funded, I’m going to have serious doubts in humanity’s sense of humor.

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