Save The Date: National March For Bigfoot

Mark your calendars because someone on Facebook has decided August 30th, 2014 will be host to the National March for Bigfoot¹. There won’t be ‘squatchers marching through Washington D.C. in ghillie suits, knocking branches against trees to raise awareness of the North American wood ape’s plight. Instead it’s marked as “worldwide” which is internet code for “Yeah, I can’t be arsed beyond making this page”.

Bigfoot should be labeled as an endangered species. We should do everything we can to preserve this majestic creature because he’s totally real and stuff.

On the last Saturday in August gather somewhere convenient and march around while making up chants about saving Bigfoot. Signs are optional but encouraged. Gathering in groups is fun but stomping around in your back yard by yourself shouting about saving Bigfoot is also encouraged.

-brought to you by the council for getting worked up over imaginary things

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Ah, slacktivism.

Members of the page are (rightfully) poking fun at people like Rick Dyer, Tom Biscardi and their ilk turning cryptozoology into a laughingstock. Those involved with serious inquiry suffer collateral damage from those publicity nightmares.

Snark aside, the event’s organizer makes a good point. Down in the Lone Star state, Bigfoot remains fair game². Our own Kwin the Eskimo³ makes a strong case for bagging just one bigfoot to settle the debate once and for all. Even then, there would be difficulties outlined in a Department of the Interior memo from 1977⁴. The major concern is with people flocking to bigfoot sites to sightsee or hunt, while assuring everyone the framework is in place to get sasquatch, or Nessie, listed as endangered.

Under U.S. Law, the Secretary of the Interior is empowered to list as threatened or endangered a species for 120 days on an emergency basis. For endangered species in the United States, the Secretary can also designate habitat that is critical to their survival. No Federal agency could then authorize, fund, or carry out any activities which would adversely modify that habitat.

I suggest everyone within the sound of this blog post R.S.V.P. to the event. Contribute legitimate research, post a few LOL sasquatches, to reinforce we’re not all watching Finding Bigfoot while wearing tinfoil hats.

Are you going to participate? Maybe get off your keister and organize something in the real world? Let us know via the NSA’s surveillance programs known as Facebook, and Twitter. Or use Tor and leave a comment below.

MORE GREAT STORIES FROM WEEK IN WEIRD:

1. https://www.facebook.com/events/518271914923550/ ↩

2. http://www.loweringthebar.net/2012/05/bigfoot-fair-game.html ↩

3. http://weekinweird.com/2013/11/12/sasquatch-must-die-why-cryptozoology-needs-a-body/ ↩

4. http://permanent.access.gpo.gov/websites/fwsgov/news.fws.gov/historic/1977/19771221.pdf ↩