Since last month, residents of the Argentinian town of Suncho Corral have reported over a dozen attacks believed to be caused by, no joke, a gnome. It all began when the “imp” sucker punched a 14 year old boy.
A source told The Sun, “He crossed by a dark area at the back of a school when he was hit from behind by the creature known as The Dwarf or Shorty-Eared One.”
Another resident, who described the culprit as a tiny man with pointy ears and an “enormous hat”, was violently knocked off his bicycle by the creature, and when he tried to run away, it blocked his path and shouted, “you shall not pass through here”. The gnome then proceeded beat the rider unconscious.
I swear to god I’m not making this up.
Juan Cruz Fariña, a priest from St. Michael’s Church, told Spanish language news Rosario3, that he believed the creature to be “a work of magic”.
“The Church could attempt an exorcism in an effort to expel demons from the possessed body.” However, he went on to say that “nothing about this case suggests a possession. It could be many other things, such as fanciful imaginings or confusion by the people of Suncho. I therefore ask everyone to take matters calmly and above all, to have faith in God. There is an explanation to all phenomena.”
The local police have received so many frightened calls about the gnome, or “Duende” as it’s called, that they’ve issued a state of alarm, warning residents not to venture off alone after dark.
Interestingly enough, this particular series of incidents is happening only 300 miles from the site of prior elf sightings in 2008.
You may remember this video of the General Guemes gnome sighting from a few years back. Genuine or not, it’s the stuff of nightmares: